Grandma Knees

I wake up to the phone ringing and hop out of bed.

I end up stepping on a three ring binder which causes me to slide a little and fall on my left knee.

I tried getting up but ended up falling on my left knee again; like I couldn't walk at all.

I was just sitting there thinking, "What the hell is going on with me?"

I got really scared, haha.

I'm sure none of you know this, but when I was in 7th grade, I stayed home sick from school, and of course my little Filipino aunt who was living with us at the time said, "Put on socks; they'll keep you warm."

So I did.

I was in the kitchen and I started seeing stars.

Not knowing what to do, I walked over to the living room, about 30 feet away so I could lie down on the couch.

While I was walking there, my speed started picking up, unintentionally.

I slipped on my socks, busted my left knee, and also hit my jaw.

Nothing happened to my jaw; it just caused my lower lip to get cut up by my top teeth.  Hot.

And my busted knee continues to hurt to this very day whenever something knocks into it.

So what I really could have just said was:

"My knee fucking hurts like hell right now, I have to clean my room, and I fucking hate Mondays."

P.S. Happy 14th birthday to my brother.